My Valentine

Going into the weekend I thought that Netflix would be the one I would give my heart to for Valentine's Day. 

This heart, the one that I made out of semi-sweet chocolate chips and an attempt with a calligraphy pen.

It started off that way - we flirted a little bit Friday night, exchanged glances, maybe a bit more but I promised that I'd never tell. 

When I woke up Saturday morning with feelings of regret and shame, I realized I'd been lying in bed for 15 hours, and also lying to myself about what I really wanted in a relationship. Netflix was always there for me, giving me anything I needed, helping me through the hard times, always offering me something new - but never challenging me. Always comfortable to be with, but never moving me forward. 

Then I remembered how deeply I wanted a swole-mate to have my whey with... so I took my opportunity to work out with ClassPass and made it a weekend full of loving me - body, mind and soul! I dated my sexy muscles. Gave them the love and attention they deserve. Took them out on the town and did them good. 

Where'd we go?

Saturday:

Pure Barre - Holy what, you barre girls are crazy and have powerful pelvic muscles. I liked... a lot. 

Sunday: 

Aspire Total Fitness - Bodypump hit my arms and shoulders just right.

The Grinning Yogi - Chill Flow for some good vibes, easy transitions and that deep stretch love. I even made it a date and invited Caitlin to come along too! 

Don't forget the part where I made this spinach, bacon, avocado, yummy something salad. I washed it down with only one glass of wine. No, I didn't spell "bottle" wrong. Glass. 

My Sunday morning workout thanked me for it. 

I can't picture a better weekend more full of love. Love of body, love of self, love of mind!

Also love of SNL40, that was pretty silly for the bit I was able to stay awake for.

How was your lovely weekend?

What I Finally Learned About Long Distance Relationships

I'm always using the hashtag #LongDistanceIsHard on Instagram any time I abuse my girlfriend power to post un-approved photos of the guy. (example below)

That's because long distance IS hard. 

The need for connection, the absence of physical contact and even the void of those mundane errands like going to the grocery store make me miss my guy. The person I choose to spend my time with who mutually enjoys spending time with me can't always be there and I'm finally starting to realize that. 

We've both entered a really challenging time in our careers where we need to support each other, and the best way that we can be there for each other is to allow the other to focus, to not demand 100% attention and sometimes just not be such an energy-suck.

Through most of my time as a long distance girlfriend, there's always someone I'll talk to who will jealously say "oh, that must be so amazing! You have a boyfriend from far away who loves you and you still get your you-time". 

Pssch, yeah right - my "me" time is spent exactly how I want to spend it, on FaceTime talking to my guy about nothing in particular and everything that means anything. 

"No, no" they'll say, "you can make the most out of this opportunity while you're not living together to do the things you want to do, see your friends, take up a hobby, find yourself again, work out, cook great meals - this is the best of both worlds if you can see how to use it."

Hm. 

So the past two weeks as we've both had to spend more time at work and invest in our careers, I've made a conscious effort to latch onto some "me" time where otherwise I'd be staring at his handsome face through the screen and waiting for the next moment we could break away for some eye contact.

As a result, the dynamics of our LDR have changed. Here's what my "me time" has looked like:

+ I've made dinners other than "our" staple 2-3 egg scramble.

+ I started a book that I can't get enough of - hey look i'm reading!

+ Treated  m'self to a pedicure.

+ Bought some Christmas gifts already (includes Brooke's Birthday present - her Summer Birthday...)

+ Don't feel guilty about my workout schedule.

+ Feel less dependent on my cross country human-being.

+ Feel crazy productive at work.

+ Feel like I'm helping him - which goes for dayyyys in the love-deposit account. 

+ Realize we have more to talk about if we're not just asking what's been up since the last breath the other one took. 

It's been important to realize that we can accomplish our goals being far away from one another, but still feeling and knowing and trusting the security of your love being just one phone call away. 

And he'll always be there, and he'll always tell me he loves me before petting each other's sleepy faces at night. He's always there to support me and nothing drastically crazy will happen if we're out of contact for three hours doing our own things. It's actually quite peaceful. 

Plus, he still sends me Snapchats that make me giggle and love him even more. 

<3 you b!