TED Tuesday: Demise of Guys

All I have to say from watching this video is "You go girls!"

This video that clocks in under 6 minutes immediately caught my attention late last night because I knew 1.3 million viewers couldn't be wrong.

Psychologist Philip Zimbardo quickly shocks our systems with hard facts like "Boys are 30% more likely than girls to drop out of school", "Girls out-perform guys through all levels of school" and that "Boys are 5x more likely than girls to have attention deficit disorder."

His argument rests on the thought that boy's (also grown men's) brains are being digitally rewired by the rising use of the internet and the decreasing engagement in social settings - especially interactions with us pretty ladies of the world.

A reported steady increase of male shyness and social awkwardness is nothing to laugh at. This leads to less eligible men to choose from (all my single ladies), more painful situations, awkward conversations, bad dates and just less fun - amiright? 

Excessive internet use and gaming (ahem, Dan) are arousal addictions and therefore are much more harmful as the users are continuously looking for something new, something fresh and something that they've never experienced before.

All of a sudden I realize why Dan has to have 7 new video games this fall, a brand new console that X-Box has come out with and ultimately the reason why he took this week off from work (okay, yes, also to play with puppies - lucky guy). It's also the reason he "forgot" to come to bed last night (honey, c'mere!)

So who should care about the "Demise of guys"?

Probably you, probably me, maybe anyone who ever hopes to be a parent, an educator.

Especially all you ladies out there who want a real man to talk to, who can dance with you and even reads your blog for more than just your use of gifs.

Enjoy! 

[ted id=1206]

Throwback Thursday: Strike a Pose

We talked a lot on Tuesday about Power Posing and I hope it got you thinking as much as it got me thinking.

This week I've seen people responding differently to what my non-verbal cues are saying. As a result, I've found myself more aware of everyone else's weak shrunken bodies or confident upright gorilla-statures. I can smell that confidence from a mile away and my oh my isn't. it. sexy.

Consciously standing tall and sitting upright to convince others what to think of me has caused me to reflect on what I think about myself.

I've always had a certain showmanship about me and am not afraid of being the center of attention. I don't mind taking the lead, I don't mind making a public fool of myself and as an athlete I grew to crave the spotlight. 

That person I just described is me when I'm in a large crowd, in an anonymous setting or when it really counts for making an impression.

When things get a little more personal, that picture can change... for the worse.

Let's share a few experiences from my youth:

• I wrote notes to teachers and emails to my parents rather than having real conversations.


• My boyfriend from 5th to 6th grade and I only talked on AIM while at school I'd have my FRIENDS pass notes to him.


• I couldn't order my own food at a restaurant


• Through my adult years, I still had anxiety ordering food at a drive-thru window.


• I couldn't find the courage to speak up for myself, approach new people or make new friends until they invited me to the conversation.

What it was about these closer interactions that scared me is still a mystery and what continues to give me anxiety about personal interactions remains unanswered.

Just this past Monday I led a difficult conversation at the office in the morning, then that same evening I found myself introverted and timid walking into an Apple store for a Genius Bar appointment about my iPhone camera not working. (to which Dan shakes his head and helps me through it, but can't see what I'm so worried about)

What causes me to shine in the difficult situation and crumble in the ordinary everyday conversation? Ego I suppose.

Using the power of positive self-reinforcement through body language and visualization will really help me overcome these fears in my personal life while allowing improvement for the proud, confident and composed Jessi many see everyday.

Today's Throwback Thursday is brought to you by a little girl who's always had a little swagger in her walk and knew the right time to turn up the lights and let 'em shine.