TED Tuesday: Rejection Therapy

Rejection sucks, doesn't it?

To not be wanted, to not be needed. To not be 'the right person for the job'. 

The fears of rejection and failure have often stopped me from doing many things in my life. Leaps and risks haven't been taken because I know how bad a "no" can feel. Something so small can crush your dreams and sometimes your spirit in the process. 

The fear of rejection is the most debilitating fear that I've ever experienced. Sometimes I'm afraid of no. Sometimes I'm afraid of yes. Afraid of a "no" because that immediate rejection is a shot to my ego and my self worth. It's a reflection on others' perception of me and what I'm worth. I'm equally afraid of a "yes" because what if the perception of me is great, but then I'm unable to deliver. I'm not the right person for the job, I fail miserably and disappoint whoever gave me that chance in the first place. 

I also fear rejection because even though I've felt it over and over - I'm still not used to it. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing - but it seems like life would be better if you were desensitized to the feeling. That would mean that rejection wouldn't hurt as bad and would allow you to carry forward much quicker than your usual earth-shaking catastrophe experiences. 

So hey - what would happen if you purposefully sought out rejection? If you asked people for things that you knew they would turn you down for - causing those "no's" to cut you less and less each time you heard one. That would make you less scared right? Sure the "no's" wouldn't be to things that significantly mattered in your world, but you'd at least become accustomed to asking for things and learning people's thresholds right?

Well I have a treat for you! 

Today's TED Talk goes over Jia Jiang's experiences as he subjected himself to 100 Days of Rejection Therapy to get over his fear. Watch the way that he surprised himself and his blog readers in the outrageous things he attempted (and really just how many he was not rejected for). 

Enjoy!